Blake • Counsel

10 Things Us Women Are Not Settling For In 2020

1. Less. First and foremost! How many times have you known that you deserved better? A better job? A better relationship? A better situation? Although, you knew you deserved better you were comfortable in the current situation, so you allowed it to remain your current situation. In 2020, that mentality is dead. Only remain in less than situations, while you are transitioning, out of that situation and into a better one.

2. Half-ass love. Do not let anybody half- ass love you. You are deserving of the most dramatic, romantic, exaggerated love that you desire. Do not settle for the excuses. You are not asking for too much, especially if what you are asking for, you are reciprocating. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel like you are hard to love, whatever you desire, you deserve. PERIOD.

3. Half- ass friends. The same thing applies for friendships. DO NOT SETTLE. If you are in a friendship, that is draining, toxic, or just not serving you anymore, you have the right to put yourself first. People often make you feel like you are wrong, for giving up on friendships, but anything that isn’t benefiting you in the most positive way, is just another thing stunting your growth. Do not give more than you receive, it will leave you feeling empty.

4. Financial Hardships. Sis is getting in her bag. Sis is finding new hobbies, looking for ways to make them into businesses. Sis is us. I encourage everyone to find something you are passionate about and try to see if you can make it into a profitable business. It won’t be easy and it won’t take off as soon as you launch it. Also, I don’t know who needs to hear this but invest in yourself, before you in vest in your closet. The decisions we make today will be felt in 5 years. Thank yourself in advance.

5.Unneeded Comparisons. You are you. She is she. I think I speak for many when I say, it’s very challenging not to compare yourself to people around you, who seem like they are doing more than you. They might be. That’s amazing for them. The grass is always greener on the other side. The most empowered women in this world did not get there by comparing themselves to other woman who they felt were doing better. They used those women for inspiration. They used them as reassurance that it’s possible to be great. Anything you want in this world, it’s possible to be great. Channel it. It’s yours.

6. Judgement from people who sin just like US. I judge. You judge. I’ve been judge. You’ve been judge. We all judge, and are the product of judgement. I often find myself not wanting to engage in certain things because I’m not sure of what other people will think. But lately, I’ve learned that people are going to find a reason to judge you regardless of what you do. If you do something positive, “you’re doing it for ulterior motives.” If you’re doing something negative “you’re doing too much.” Regardless though, these judgements come from other human beings, who sin just like us, so who cares. Live your life.

7. Low-Self Esteem. It’s not easy enough to just stop having low-self esteem. It’s something that comes with time, patience, and practice. We are queens. We create life. We have so much to offer this world, and low-self esteem is another thing that is doing nothing other than stunting our growth. I encourage you to read my article, 11 Daily Steps that grow confidence. /

8. A lack of boundaries. Setting boundaries is so good for your mental health. Saying no when you need to. Not answering your phone when you don’t want to. Not giving an explanation as to why you can’t do something. You are not entitled to help anyone or do anything. All you have to do in this life is live and die. Don’t ever feel like you have to sacrifice yourself to make others happy. Set boundaries. Set them with your things, your space, and your time.

9. Disrespect. Don’t let anybody disrespect you. Don’t tolerate it, and don’t let anyone get comfortable doing it. You don’t deserve it, and you are strong enough to stop it. If you feel disrespected, speak up. Use your voice, communicate. If you are non-confrontational and this isn’t as easy for you, distance yourself when disrespect is present.

10. Stagnation. We are always moving, changing, and altering. 2020 is a year of transformation. We have been in the house for over a month. This is the perfect time for self reflection. Ask yourself questions. Spend time alone. Find what you need to do to become the best version of yourself. AND DO IT.